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| Drawing by PearlEden. http://pearleden.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=24#/d4hhufa |
There's a very valid reason for that on my part: Businesses are in business to make money. There's no reason on Earth why I should be working at a loss for a business that is profiting off of the work I produce for them.I can also say that at this point I think I've heard it all when it comes to businesses trying to convince me to work for them for free too.
Tony Sleep (http://tonysleep.co.uk/node/687) said it better than I ever could so I'm not going to retread what he's already said. I'm going to recall what happened the last time a business tried to get me to work for "trade". Now, I'm not posting this to be vindictive or because "misery loves company". No, I'm posting it because looking back at just how absurd the whole thing went, if it hadn't happened to me I probably wouldn't have believed that it really happened. For obvious reasons I'm not going name names (so I'm going to intentionally be a little vague at times).
In Late 2011/Early 2012 I received a voicemail from the creative director of a well known business (that's owned by an even larger publicly held company) about doing some photos for them. Before I called him back I started doing some research and the first question that popped into my mind is why he's even calling me in the first place. Looking at the previous body of work done for them, it was rather obvious that I wasn't a good fit. Not that I couldn't do it, but when people usually contact me it's because they want pinup. I returned his call and we set up a meeting at their offices near Cambridge, MA.
The meeting went like this:
- Initially starts off telling me that he LOVES my work and he wants me because my work is very commercial-friendly. They're trying to change their image and they feel that my work is classy and a good fit for them. (OK, not a bad start really… it goes down hill at Mach 9 from is).
- Makes a comment that there's really only two or three photographers in this area that do this full time, and that if I worked for them for "trade", I could potentially be one of those photographers too. (umm... I must have had a sign on my forehead that said I was born last night.).
- Tells me that although it's trade, it's an awesome opportunity because of who they are. Additionally tells me that he feels bad asking another pro photographer to do it because he's also a pro photographer. (First thing to pop into my mind at this moment: That's a half-truth. If it's such an awesome opportunity then why the hell aren't YOU doing it?).
- Tells me that he's seen my work EVERYWHERE. They've been scouring Model Mayhem and Facebook looking for potential models and I've worked with every model they've considered. (I don't work with just anyone and I'm very selective about who I will work with. I had taken an almost 2 year hiatus up until this point so I haven't worked with many new models (mainly just my muses), so I know he's lying through his front teeth).
- Goes off towards left field and makes a remark about how a lot of the girls they use tend to get naked and that I'll see and be able to take pics of it all. ( (sarcasm) Yeah that's not creepy AT ALL. (/sarcasm) Actually this was mentioned both on the initial phone call and once more in the physical meeting. That already told me what I was dealing with before I set foot into the place. I remind him that since neither they nor I have any use for that and can't use those kind of shots I'm not going to take pics like that in the first place (nevermind that's just being perverted, not to mention that shit will get you (rightfully) sued too). Even though I'm straight and I love women as much as the next guy, I'm not a creep. I do this because I love doing it and creating something special, not because I'm desperate to see "nekkid chicks").
- Name dropping companies and making statements that he's not necessarily authorized to be making statements about (mainly liquor companies, but also a few other local businesses), alluding that they'll hire me if they see the work I do with them. (In my head I'm calling bullshit on this as fast as it's leaving his mouth).
- Asks me to be a talent scout for them, specifically saying that I would bring in some of the models. (I declined since that's even more work that I don't want to do for free, and I'm not going to ask the models to work for free or foot the bill for this company either).
- Tells me that because what he wants to do is "out-of-band" of what they normally do, he doesn't have a budget for this and that he needs to prove to his boss and to corporate that it'll work. (I took a page from Tony Sleep's play book and looked up the finances of their parent company (they're publicly traded). They grossed almost $400 million in 2010 (and were on track to make that in 2011). I was also failing to see the point of how if his department legitimately didn't have a budget how it was somehow my problem too. (*Update Feb 2020: I actually was technically wrong here. Yes the parent company did gross $400 million that year, but overall the company has been losing money since 1999. Still, the point is the ability to pay is THEIR problem, not mine. I'm not a charity.)).
- Proceeds to tell me that a very well known and liked local professional sports player is a horn-dog, a womanizer, and that if I get some models in there and do some shoots with them, most likely I'd get to meet him because he'd be calling me so he could fuck them (I'm paraphrasing there, but that's pretty much what he said). (SAY WHAT??!? I still can't figure out the point of telling me this. I mean, even if it's true that this sports star is perpetually horny and has enough clout that he can get models to bang, why should I give a shit? (*Update 2020. The sports player he was name dropping was Rob Gronkowski. Rob had/has no knowledge of this guy dropping his name so don't go demonizing Rob for someone else's stupidity)).
During all of this I couldn't help but think that he was trying to convince himself that this was such a great deal and that if he kept repeating it, it would sound that way to me too. Eventually I managed to make him see reality and we settled on some terms that if they stuck to, it would have been a pretty cool gig and I would have actually done it! I still would rather be paid for my work but in this instance under the scope we first agreed to, it would have legitimately benefited me. My work would have appeared to a new set of eyes that normally doesn't see it and I would have actually enjoyed doing the work.
That's not how this ends though.
Second meeting:
- Wants to recap what we talked about earlier and in the process, tries to completely change the terms from what was agreed upon the first time. (Instead of only doing a "key" shot for them, now they want me to do general photography two to three times a week IN ADDITION to everything else (which meant I'd be working nights and weekends on all of this… a full-time job.... for free... IN ADDITION TO ME HAVING TO HOLD DOWN A FULL TIME JOB!)).
- Instead of a contract, wants to work under a "letter of intent". (Umm.. yeah… no thanks. Legally that would have had less value than a wad of used toilet paper after Taco Bell runs one of their 99 cent Fourth Meal Burrito Extreme specials).
- Goes on about the nekkid chick thing again, including telling me about how some previous models they used were skanks (telling me about how "one of the model's 'box' fell out at an event). (Ok, and this is relevant in what way to the task at hand??). At first I thought he was going on about it because he was at first telling me that that's NOT what he wanted. Later on in our meeting he did a complete 180 though (which you'll see later).
- In addition to the aforementioned work starts hinting that he wants me to do graphic design work for their website (or at least graphics that are ready to just drop into the web page). (The word "no" comes to mind… ).
- His assistant makes a remark that their customers don't really care if the model is photographed in front of a green screen with a low-end camera. (My answer to his assistant (that I actually did say to him): if that's the case then why do you need me? ).
- Asks me about three times (once at the initial meeting, once over the phone, and once at the second meeting) if I do corporate headshots. (I can do it but not for free. I tell him no, but I know some people that would gladly do it for a fee; me included).
- Wants me to take the workload off of his assistant by acting as an unpaid talent scout/coordinator.
- Proceeds to remind me that even though I was doing work for them I wasn't their "official photographer".
- Wants me to photograph events for "trade", telling me that my name will be on their promotional materials, on signs, etc.
- Proceeds to name drop other business names again, this time telling me about one particular liquor company that uses pin up in their advertising. (I tell him that I happen to know that this one particular business that he's trying to convince me will hire me for my pinup work WON'T hire me. The reason? I happen to know who their photographer is and I know that they did all of the work for that company FOR TRADE; exactly what he's trying to get me to do for HIM! *Update 2020: The business he was name dropping was Narragansett Beer.)).
- Apparently now he doesn't want pinup but he won't actually tell me what he wants (he keeps flip-flopping). I try to nail down precisely what he wants but instead he keeps skirting around the issue. Instead he keeps wanting to focus on what *I* want in return for working for them (since money apparently isn't an option here). When I press about what exactly he's looking for, he then starts showing me previous work from another photographer (and the models they've used before) that was done for them. (Ironically he used the same photos at the last meeting to show me exactly what he DIDN'T want, which now has become what he DOES want. He then proceeds to start ripping apart the previous photographer AND the models too, calling some of them fat, ugly, etc. He picks apart the photographer in question too over his photoshop skills! ALL RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! I don't know if the previous photographer(s) and models did the work for "trade" but my gut is telling me yes. So not only do they want top quality work, they want it for free. That and I can tell that if he's going to do that to them, I *KNOW* he'll do it to me too when they try to get the next person in).
- Tries again to remind me about how potentially I could make this my full-time job and all the gorgeous women I'd be working with.
- Goes on again about how he doesn't have any budget for all of this. I remind him that I'm not footing the bill for them in lieu of them not having a budget. (Again, this is my problem in what way exactly? He did agree to pay for my expenses though... provided I tell him in advance what I need to spend, but the impression I got was that he wanted me to absorb any costs involved).
- At this point he starts telling me again that I'd have to get some of the models in for them because they were having problems with models not showing up. (I tell him that the type of models he's looking for (basically Playboy/Maxim type) WON'T work for trade and that he'd have to pay them at least $100-$150/hr. He tells me that that's not a problem and he'll gladly pay… (…..So, you *DO* have a budget, you just don't want to pay!) ).
There's more that happened but I that's the gist of it. I eventually managed to bring him back around to what we originally talked and agreed to. He was then going to write up the paperwork based on that and he'd get back to me. A day or so after leaving the second meeting I sent him a message politely declining to work for them.
Honestly, after reading the above wouldn't you do the same? They couldn't have paid me enough to take the gig at this point just on the sheer principle of the matter. Even ignoring the ethics reasons I could tell that the relationship would have become toxic rather quickly afterwards.
It's been a few weeks since I declined them and other than a question a day after asking why I had a change of heart, I haven't heard a peep about it.
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